if you dare...
http://party-fowl.mybrute.com
Thursday, April 16, 2009
Thursday, April 9, 2009
Monday, April 6, 2009
high level humor at the southside irish parade
i've been way busy lately, so i'm still trying to catch up with stuff that happened over the past month.
my cousin came to visit for the southside parade last month. we met up with some friends and had a pretty good time, in spite of the droves of drunken teenagers with shamefully horrible brogues and "fuck me, i'm irish!" t-shirts.
the weather was surprisingly warm and sunny for chicago in mid-march (i wasn't even wearing a coat), which was pretty nice... except that i was fairly sunburned from my trip to california, and the unusually clement weather exacerbated the situation.
we were waiting at a bathroom line when my cousin waved and said he had to tell me something. i asked what he wanted, and he kept telling me to come closer.
given our long, long history of inflicting physical/psychological discomfort on each other for entertainment, this should have been my first clue that something was wrong. unfortunately, it had been a long night/day and i went over anyway.
"what the hell is it?" i asked.
"i just wanted to tell you that now you're standing in puke," he said.
delightful.
my cousin came to visit for the southside parade last month. we met up with some friends and had a pretty good time, in spite of the droves of drunken teenagers with shamefully horrible brogues and "fuck me, i'm irish!" t-shirts.
the weather was surprisingly warm and sunny for chicago in mid-march (i wasn't even wearing a coat), which was pretty nice... except that i was fairly sunburned from my trip to california, and the unusually clement weather exacerbated the situation.
we were waiting at a bathroom line when my cousin waved and said he had to tell me something. i asked what he wanted, and he kept telling me to come closer.
given our long, long history of inflicting physical/psychological discomfort on each other for entertainment, this should have been my first clue that something was wrong. unfortunately, it had been a long night/day and i went over anyway.
"what the hell is it?" i asked.
"i just wanted to tell you that now you're standing in puke," he said.
delightful.
Friday, April 3, 2009
after a brief hiatus...
ok, i'm back now. here's something that happened a few weeks ago:
i was at a party at my friend steve's apartment in wicker park, boozing it up with some bros.
we were down in his basement drinking and i saw an older lady, probably late 50's, wandering around the place. she had this weird hat that looked kind of like a beret and a massive canvas bag clutched tight to her chest. she looked for all the world like an older hippie who refused to age gracefully, vainly attempting to "hang" with the "kids."
after watching her for a bit, i realized i was only half-right; she most likely was an aging hippie, but she didn't seem to care much for hanging out. true to the enterprising entrepreneurship that made america great, she was circulating around the party selling homemade pumpkin muffins laced with (gasp) marijuana. it was like a real-life episode of "weeds."
she eventually made her way over to me, and said "you want one?"
i responded: "what do you have?"
old lady: (snorts) "what do you think?"
me: "i dunno, a bag."
old lady: "are you a cop?"
me: "what do you think?"
old lady: "they're drug muffins. five dollars each."
me: "i see..."
i casually pulled my coat aside and gave her quick glimpse of my shirt, which happened to have something that looked like a police star on the upper left part of my chest.
she was pretty old and she looked like she was about to have a heart attack when i did that, so i only strung her along for a few seconds. but it's nice when you can still make someone's eyes bug out with terror after so many years.
i was at a party at my friend steve's apartment in wicker park, boozing it up with some bros.
we were down in his basement drinking and i saw an older lady, probably late 50's, wandering around the place. she had this weird hat that looked kind of like a beret and a massive canvas bag clutched tight to her chest. she looked for all the world like an older hippie who refused to age gracefully, vainly attempting to "hang" with the "kids."
after watching her for a bit, i realized i was only half-right; she most likely was an aging hippie, but she didn't seem to care much for hanging out. true to the enterprising entrepreneurship that made america great, she was circulating around the party selling homemade pumpkin muffins laced with (gasp) marijuana. it was like a real-life episode of "weeds."
she eventually made her way over to me, and said "you want one?"
i responded: "what do you have?"
old lady: (snorts) "what do you think?"
me: "i dunno, a bag."
old lady: "are you a cop?"
me: "what do you think?"
old lady: "they're drug muffins. five dollars each."
me: "i see..."
i casually pulled my coat aside and gave her quick glimpse of my shirt, which happened to have something that looked like a police star on the upper left part of my chest.
she was pretty old and she looked like she was about to have a heart attack when i did that, so i only strung her along for a few seconds. but it's nice when you can still make someone's eyes bug out with terror after so many years.
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